I am writing this because I have seen a rise in the number of Civil Marriages over the past years. Though the Church recognizes the validity of Civil Marriage, I am hoping that we discern well to whom we would like to receive blessings from or to seal our vows with. In front of God? Or In front of a political leader or lawyer?
As a Catholic woman, I desire to share with you my insights on this matter. May this write-up inspire those who are still discerning on entering the vocation of marriage and those who are thinking of getting married in the Church. May this be of help!
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Marriage or Holy Matrimony in the Catholic faith is considered a sacrament. It means it is sacred. A sacrament is a visible sign of God in our midst to give us grace. Since marriage is a sacrament, we believe that it is instituted by Christ Himself.
We perceive the sacrament of Holy Matrimony as a sacred covenant between a baptized man and a baptized woman. The ceremony within the Church is seen as a way to solemnize and sanctify the union in the eyes of God. Since Marriage is sacred it is meant to be celebrated in a sacred place, inside the Church.
Marrying in the Church is also a public declaration of our commitment to love each other with a love that is faithful, permanent, exclusive, self-sacrificing, and life-giving, and to also live out our marriage by the teachings of the Catholic faith. That’s why we say our vows and declare consent in front of God and the whole church. We believe we are not only entering into a legal contract but also receiving the grace of God through the sacrament to strengthen our relationship.
“Since marriage establishes the couple in a public state of life in the Church, it is fitting that its celebration be public, in the framework of a liturgical celebration, before the priest (or a witness authorized by the Church), the witnesses, and the assembly of the faithful.”
Catechism of the Catholic Church – Paragraph # 1663
The Priest will ask these questions which only reflect the meaning of Holy Matrimony.
Have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourself to each other in marriage?”
“Will you honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives?”
and, “Will you accept children lovingly from God, and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?”
This is then followed by the exchange of vows.
“I, ___, take you, ___, for my lawful wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, until death does us part.”
These declarations are our way of making a covenant not just with our partner but also with the Lord. The Catholic faith teaches us that marriage is a natural institution established by God, this means by marrying within the Church, we honor this. And we seek to elevate our marriage beyond our secular understanding and embrace the spiritual aspects of our union.
Why am I sharing these things?
Because society twisted our idea of marriage, we may have forgotten the true essence of a wedding ceremony celebrated inside the Church. It is not about our decorations, the long list of entourage and guests, the dresses and make-ups, the extravagant feels of our wedding, but the sacrament that we will receive with our partner on that day. Hopefully, as you prepare for your wedding day and as you receive the sacrament of Holy Matrimony, you’ll remember the true reason for what you are celebrating.
When Luigi and I received the sacrament of marriage last 2021 we were certain that we would enter into a lifelong journey of loving, forgiving, and simply allowing the Lord to lead us. Our marriage started the moment we accepted and gave our consent to honor each other in front of God and our loved ones. Building our little family is never easy but, in our difficulties, we remember the grace that we’ve received on our wedding day. It was God’s grace that brought us to each other, it was His grace that united as us one, and it is His grace that works in our midst as we journey as a family.
God’s grace suffices. And we are forever grateful for the gift of Marriage!
Truly, the Holy Matrimony is sacred, it is a sacrament. And it is meant to be celebrated where it should be.
Journeying beyond,
Deanne
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